Blogger's Dilemma

To be quite honest, most days I wait for something to truly ruffle my feathers or strike me as uniquely fun or interesting before I blog about anything. I need to be fired up, excited, intrigued and a little angry. (These are the reasons the relationship with your blog is like a spicy summer romance at times and others, a stale and lifeless thread you to which you cling. Truly, one of the most dysfunctional synergies I've ever been a part of.)

I bring this up because I have found not one, but THREE!, things that have me a little ruffled around the edges this morning. Ok, more than ruffled. Puffed up as hell and sputtering to my coffee cup like grumpy old men do at their newspapers. Which do I choose?

I found these images on the interwebs today:

There's so much wrong here I stutter thinking of it.

Or:

Again, this is serious. When is rape ok? Never. It is never ok. The fact that this many high school students think there are "conditions that allow" rape is bad, people.

And, last but not least:

Immigration is a serious issue. One we need to take a legitimate look at as a nation and be honest about, even if its just in the mirror. Have we ever, EVER, (as a European based people) assimilated into anything? No. We conquer, kill, claim and then remodel. It's our modus operandi.

Well, one of these will be forthcoming soon enough and the anticipation (I know you're excited) will be over. My rant will be complete (until later, to be honest) and most of these pictures will feature in something I write, because all of them piss me off.

The $64,000 question is, which one pisses me off the most?

Then and Now

Somewhere, in the middle of rushing around trying to get things done in my life, I realized I'd grown up. It wasn't the kind of thing that one takes in stride. Rather, it was more like an abrupt and slightly painful reality smack. Suddenly, I was OLD.

Not just older. OLD. My youth was gone, my best years were behind me, I noticed imaginary wrinkles and started waiting for gravity to win and everything to start that inevitable slide downward toward "sag"; where your chin and your earlobes and all the other stuff just seems to become too big for the space it's in and gives up and lets go. (Ladies, you feel me here. Men, some of you get out of this whole aging thing really lucky.)

I began to check my reflection in the mirror more seriously and some very old woman looked back at me, unexpectedly.

The point is, I was dumbfounded by the sudden, swift passage of so very much time. Where does it go? I think back to funny stories and people I knew in high school like they were sometime last week, not over a decade ago. So, I did the unthinkable. I broke out my yearbook from Junior year. I wanted visual confirmation that things were as drastic as I imagined; that a full 15 years had passed.

In order to do a proper comparison, I scanned my (16 year old self) yearbook photo into the computer, so I could put it side by side with my most current (almost 31 year old) self. I was as surprised as I imagined I would be, but not for the reasons I'd expected.

(Just for clarification, the only alterations to these photos was to black and white the right side one, to make it fair against the left side one. I was on yearbook staff that year and we made the decision to only do the senior portraits in color, along with some of the section header photos and text, with everyone else in black an white for artistic effect and to save a little on printing costs. Also, it's kinda grainy from the scan.)

After a little bit of contemplation, I decided age looks good on me. I did it alright and I am not the suddenly creaky old lady I imagined after surviving a whole year of being 30. Wisdom suits me. I look a little more tired around my eyes, but who doesn't after another fifteen years of living? 

And as for that 16 year old me, well... she's pretty OK with who she ended up being and I've forgiven her for being young, dumb, impetuous, rash and stubborn for no reason. I've even asked the fun parts of her to stick around and hang out with the now-smarter parts of me. (You can do that in your 30s, so I'm told.)

We've finally come to an agreement on what we want to be when we grow up, too. ;)  I guess a little perspective is a good thing.

Lizards sure do make nice boots

I was happily scrolling away on my Facebook feed, one eye open with coffee in hand, when this jumped out at me from amid the 'he liked/she liked' mumbo-jumbo. It was a GOP rhetoric meme, liked by someone I know, which was sort of like a cold water culture shock. 

Not because someone disagrees with me (we all know where I stand in terms of political lines), that happens. It is entirely acceptable to have different opinions. But, isn't there a line you can't be willing to cross? Like, perhaps, "I will not be dumb on purpose." 

This is the image that sparked the whole thing:

.....

My immediate reaction was stunned silence. Are people that desperate in today's political climate that they will make willfully ignorant statements like this one and other people will not only by into it, but promote this viewpoint?

Politics aside, lets think about this for a moment. (Given the vocabulary presentation level of the man in the photo, I'll explain carefully and slowly.) Lizards that make good boots, as it is so eloquently stated, are also reptiles. Do you know what reptiles do for the environment?

Reptiles are very beneficial. They are an important part of the food chain in controlling rodents, feeding on carrion and alligators are important even by creating dens and gator holes that help protect wetland species in droughts.

Reptiles impose an important check on insect and rodent populations. Some of the most venomous snakes in the world such as the Indian cobra actually prevent the spread of disease-carrying rodents, even in urban centers, so their usefulness often outweighs their danger. However, far more benign reptiles also act to control populations of pests. 

According to the website Animal Bytes from Busch Gardens, crocodiles and alligators also prevent overpopulation of fish species in coastal regions and wetlands, which is pivotal in keeping these aquatic ecosystems healthy and balanced. A healthy aquatic ecosystem is instrumental for fisheries that make their living in these environments.


But, they pretty much just make a nice pair of boots. Do you even live on this planet?

I can hear the counter argument now. "What's one species of lizard compared to lack of dependency on foreign oil?"

Number one, the Keystone XL pipeline will NOT remove our need for foreign fossil fuels, not by a long shot. Second, importing it from Canada and Mexico is still importing it. Third, I wonder how many other species got the same consideration before they were made extinct? Perhaps the Tasmanian tiger, the Zanzibar leopard, the Madeiran large white moth, where loss of habitat due to construction as well as pollution from agricultural fertilizers are two major causes of the species' decline.

Those are only 3 of a list of species that have gone extinct in our quest for "progress" that isn't really all that progressive. The Keystone XL pipeline project, the tar sands it creates, are dirty and nasty forms of fuel which will further pollute the environment and harm ALL living creatures. What happens when we find OURSELVES on the endangered list?

As for the EPA itself, the tagline under that meme from the previous poster said "The EPA is just another of Obama's anti-domestic oil puppets". 

.... -headshake-

The EPA, or Environmental Protection Agency, is responsible for the fact that they can no longer put asbestos in your insulation and for that fact that you don't have to drink water contaminated with urine, fecal matter, lead, toxic waste, industrial runoff, and a list of other nasty things. The address climate change, the protection of endangered species and they have the power to make CORPORATIONS pay for what they do to the environment in the name of profit.

How is that a puppet of anything? And how, for the love of clean water, can you think its a bad thing?

I suppose, if you can save .10 cents at the gas pump, the wiping out a whole species is alright, not to mention destroying hundreds of acres of ecosystem. Who needs trees and land and water and clean air to breathe and stuff?

Oh. Right. We do.

In response...

...to the Facebook discussion I photo'ed for the Honest Discussion post from earlier today, my Transformer friend sent me this on my news feed just a little bit ago. It really makes my entire point for me. I am enraged and saddened, frustrated.

Seriously people. What is wrong with us? 

An honest discussion

While surfing the internet, I came across this graphic image from Being Liberal about why we need feminism in today's ever changing world societies. Take a good look at it and let what this is actually saying sink in, people.

Women shouldn't have rights? Be slaves? Be seen and not heard? Be dominated? Know their place? 

Are we serious here, World? Especially America, the supposed land of equality and freedom. Shame on you. If you aren't familiar with the way Google's search process works, it takes what you have personally searched for into consideration for suggestions, yes. But, much like Twitter, it takes the most common or popular 'trending' searches as well. This is what the results of the most popular searches yields currently on the subject of women.

I was understandably frustrated at the sight of this. Especially because of the Anonymous effort to bring attention to the stereotyped rape culture we live in today by bringing national attention to the Steubenville rape case, which would have been quietly shoved under the rug, otherwise. (Thanks, guys.) The media results after the guilty verdict came down remind me again why we need feminism in this country: 'The tragedy of two young boys ruined football careers after the verdict was announced'. WHAT?! 

Did we forget that a young girl was raped and video taped, pissed on in the street and then turned into an internet joke and the tragedy is that two rapists can't play football anymore? Gee, thanks for some perspective on the world, CNN.

As per my norm, I posted it on Facebook, where I do most of my ranting via memes and little snippet comments. Here are the results (again, people are darkened out to protect their privacy, because I care about them. I'm out there on purpose, but I won't make anyone else be. I'm also friends with a lot of Transformers.):

So, I suppose the only thing left to say is....

.... and I will not shut up, not ever, until people see the fallacy is our "traditional" thought processes and something is done about how we as a nation mourn for the rapists and not the victim. 

View response

Name your inner ninja!

This was adorable on my Facebook feed this morning and I decided to share the outcomes of it thus far because, truthfully, my name makes me sound like a bad ass. Here is the image on which we based our information:

The rules are simply this: take each letter or your first name and match it with the corresponding letters, like so -

P  - H-O - E  - B-E

No-ri - mo-ku-zu-ku

 My ninja name is Norimokuzuku! Fear me!

What goes around...

Once upon a time, there was a little girl of about three years old with long and wavy dark hair who had a pair of plastic safety scissors, doing crafts on the back porch with her friend Melissa who was crowned with great big golden curls. 

Somehow (I can't remember how this all went down, only the aftermath) the two decided to give each other reverse mohawk hair cuts with those plastic safety scissors and got discovered right afterward, before their handiwork could be properly examined and the fallout was awful. We both got very short, boy-like hair cuts and we not allowed to do crafts for some time after that.

Well, until today, this was what my son looked like at the age of 10. 

Until, in lieu of brushing the tangles out of the back of his hair, he decided to get my kitchen scissors and cut a huge chunk out of the back of those lovely golden locks and I was forced to cut his hair. I'm no stylist, and my kitchen scissors are all I had, so after a few truly awful attempts to shape it up into some form of legit 'do, I gave up and borrowed the buzz clippers from the Landlord upstairs and chopped it off. 

Now, he looks like this:

Oh well. It's just hair. He's adorable either way and irony is amusing, even in real life.

Explaining #iftheyasked

So, everyone has a list. Right? Yanno what I mean. The list of celebrities or fictional characters or somehow famous people that you would "do" (in this case, read as: wanna hang out with, bang, talk with, meet, etc). Basically, who ever you think are the top 5-10 coolest people out there in the public eye. It's really a lot harder to choose than you think. There are a crap ton of people out there I would like to spend an hour with, just hanging out and hearing their thoughts, so to narrow it down is really a science. 

The boyfriend maintains that this is correct and occasional tests his manliness against my list. This is how the #if theyasked thing was born. If someone from my list showed up in something we were watching, I would always start off by saying something tacky as hell like "Damn, I would love to..." or "Mhm, he is on my list" and then trail off, look at him and grin and say "but, yanno, only if they asked." I was really being a smart ass and he made a game out of it by challenging me.

Boyfriend: "You say that about everyone on TV. Who exactly is on this 'list' anyway?"

Me: "Uhhh...." and I was stumped. I really had no idea what order or who I would put on this mythical list. "Lemme think about it," was all I managed to say in the midst of his victory laughing. Which, in fairness, he deserved. -sheepish-

But, I did it. I made my list after a crap ton of soul searching. It fluxes occasionally in placement, but the hierarchy is pretty set and I think it totals seven people (but, only three of them do I have a total crush on). Thus, I started the hashtag on Twitter whenever I thought about it, in the midst of watching a show or listening to something. I'm proud of the systematic way I narrowed this thing down, the amount of diligent thought it took to make this list. It's like picking your three wishes, and you can't wish for more wishes.

First, you must decide what attributes determine if they make the list. Attractiveness? Talent? Voice? Personality? A character portrayal? Then, you must narrow that pool down (its larger than you think it would be) by selecting the people that best fit your idea of awesome in the category you chose them for initially. Which one of them stands out as the most interesting or exciting or creative or likable. And, invariably, there are the ones you're totally crushing on, which have to be accounted for as well.

Like I said, it's complex. Especially if you're a reader or a thinker, or you take fictional characters as legit choices (I do. Batman is No. 5 #if theyasked). The pool of possibilities is endless. So, #iftheyasked is the best compliment I can give someone, really.

 And, I will never tell which ones I have a crush on, not even if you ask nicely.

Facebook Politics

So, earlier today I posted this image on my Facebook profile from Being Liberal's page:

It sparked a few pretty good comments and one very real confession on my part. Just so we're clear, I blacked out people's names and one face to protect privacy. Remember, these people are my friends. I don't add people I don't know, but I make everything I do public so anyone can see what I have to say. I left my face and name up there for that very reason. (I left Optimus Prime because he's awesome.)

This is what ensued:

So that's my confession. I know better, I just argue politics to argue and I can't keep my mouth shut when I see someone hurting, oppressing, manipulating or degrading someone else in earnest. (Obviously, it's all a matter of perspective and opinion but this is my world-on-electronic-paper and I can do that.)

Another day, another.....baby?

So, I find myself sitting in the waiting room (next to the Waiting Room for you Omaha people) watching one of my heart sisters fill out the form to recieve a pregnancy test because the 'works' are all mucked up and she's late.

On top of that, its her birthday. She's scared. It will be their (her husband is a great guy, he's scared too) 4th child. Sadly, they lost one of the twin girls around 5 years ago to a tragic mishap. Even so, three kids (without assistance) when they were just getting on their feet is gonna be tough.

Being the good friendly I am, I couldn't let her do this alone on her birthday. So, here we go. Hand holding in progress. (wish us luck).

Just.... really? This is acceptable in 'Merica

Ok, so I may be the only person who is thinking about this at this particular moment but.... really, Rand Paul? Twelve hours? And, the trending topic on twitter afterward, which is really sad, was how much of a hero the man is... Does anyone else know what filibustering is? 

According to Miriam Webster it is: 1.
a. The use of obstructionist tactics, especially prolonged speech making, for the purpose of delaying legislative action.
b. An instance of the use of this delaying tactic.

(Imagine if your doctor sat down, because you pay for his time by the hour, and began a lengthy and impressive speech that illustrated all of his/her vast education and vocabulary and lasted for 5 hours? You would be furious and would make sure everyone knew it and didn't go see that guy again. But when a politician does it (read: businessman/lawyer) then its totally ok, right?)

A delaying, stall tactic. So, Congress is scheduled to be in session just 137 days this year and they average member makes $174,000 for that amount of time.

Let's do the math.

Assuming that Congress works 12 hours a day in that time period, then it equates to roughly $106.00 per hour. We just paid Rand Paul $1272 dollars to talk (stall the legislative process) for 12 hours. How many of you make that kind of money? I don't.

And yet, these are the people that are supposed to represent us? We're not even talking benefits, free travel expenses, etc. Just what they are paid for the amount of time they work, period. 

While I agree that the points he made are important and vital, did it really have to go that far? Why doesn't anyone argue against child hunger, for education reform, against homelessness, or about our environmental impact?

Because, it isn't sensationally newsworthy and because we won't get fired to argue with one another about real issues, just hypothetical ideas and rhetoric  "This might happen, and if it does that would be bad."

And the world gasps, the crowd goes nuts, it trends on social media and we stand divided again because of the political process (which actually hasn't happened yet, thanks to the stall tactics that created the hype to begin with). 

Honestly, this is the best recap of what the man had to say, minus the inflammatory excesses of flowery speech.

Hurry up, slacker!

So I got up today with every intention of typing up the recipe to our eggplant feast and posting artistic photos of the empty bottles. (The first because I told my mother I would email her the recipe to use for her 'Grannies and Gramps' that she adored creating food for at work; the second because I wanna feel pro at this blotting business and snappy photos help.)

Anyway, all I really got around to was answering this urgent notice (snappy pic attached) paying a bill and sending an email or two...leaving me with the choice between going without a phone for 10-12 business days to get a new one, or keep the randomly sketchy one so I stay connected.

Procrastination is both a process and an art form. :D

(This is how I ended up missing biology this quarter, too. Damn you Florida, with your seductive, warm, barefoot weather! -shakes fist-)

Happy Birthday, little brother. <3

"So, are you ok with a totally low key, uneventful birthday?"

That's the question I just asked my brother on this, his momentous 30th birthday. He was playing Minecraft on Xbox and just nodded at me, raising his wine glass in salute.

"Yeah, mostly I've been overseas for my birthday."

He's a 9 year army vet with four deployments under his belt. It's true, he been gone a lot lately. I finally convinced him to move to Omaha with me after his last one: it was time for a change.

Right now, its the best its ever been. We've got our own special recipe for eggplant parmesan cooking in the oven and a bottle of merlot breathing (to follow the bottle of pinot noir that we're finishing.thank you @hellovino) to go with dinner and we're just sobering about our recently epic roadtrip to Florida for a birthday party and how there's a magical line you cross at 29 and 3/4 that makes you feel achey and tired.

Absolutely. But, we're happy. And settled. And just making it work. That's all you can hope for, on any birthday. Cheers.

Mobile Madness

So, I always said that I would be more diligent about my recording of life's events if only I could do it on the go. Now, since my brother bought me this new phone (before you Aww, let me add he was on back to back business trips to multiple cities and bored out of his mind and my phone quit letting me talk. I could hear you, just not talk. Ok, now the Aww. It was awesome.) I have discovered apps for everything I use. I suppose it time to put my money where my mouth is, so to speak. Or my words to my fingers, or something like that.

Anyway, I still have to figure out how to upload videos from my phone and I will tell you the epic story of my recent roadtrip to Florida and why Missouri is just an awful idea in general.

Wish me luck. And, maybe, toss me around if you like me.

(Its ok, it sounded dirty to me too.....)